Xaqairy's Pokéventure

First thing I notice: The iconic Pokémon professor, Professor Oak, is no longer the one greeting you at the beginning of the game. Did he retire, or is this simply because it's a different Region? No matter.

I decide to name myself Xaqairy (Love that name). As for my rival, why not something just as unique? I decided on Taiyosu, but I'll call him Tai on here.

Xaqairy, I'm home! As I meet her in the hall, she continues. Do you know Professor Juniper?

Nope, never heard of her in my life, who the hell is she?

Actually, she's an old friend of mine, and she called me today for the first time in ages!

Oh, gee. I wonder who the hell would want to be your friend. What did she want?

This is out of the blue, but, Xaqairy! Do you want to have a Pokémon?

You must be retarded. Why else would I be playing this damn game?

Well then, do you know what a Pokédex is?

Let's see... The little encyclopedia thingy that tells you all about about a Pokémon after only seeing it once? Yeah.

You want a Pokédex, right?

How the hell else would I know what other people are talking about? Bulbapedia?

Your course of action has been set. A girl named Bianca has come here to meet you!

Oh, fuck. Really? Another one of your damn blind dates?

She's Professor Juniper's assistant. I was told to simply look for a big, green hat!

Really... A big, green hat? This is low. Even for you.

That's right! You're going to go look for Bianca. And then you'll get a Pokédex and a Pokémon to be your partner!

So this isn't a blind date? Why didn't you say so before? Geez.

Oh! Your Xtransceiver's in your Bag, right?

My Xtran-what?

Do you know how to open your bag?

Dammit woman. How old do you think I am? You know damn well I don't know this.

I'll send you off with these words from "Adventure Rules."

Oh, great. You're gonna quote something, aren't you...

"The X Button is vitally important for Trainers."

I have an X Button? It doesn't do anything on the Emulator... You must mean the I Key.

OK! Off with you now! Go look for Bianca, OK!

Fine.

Oh, great. There's Tai and his sister.

Hey! You get a Pokémon yet?

Do you see any Pokéballs on me anywhere? I'm looking for the wench with a big, green hat.

There aren't any Pokémon Trainers around here, and I'm getting bored!

Then go away. I don't like you.

A person named Bianca is giving you a Pokémon? Really?

Yes. Really. Now shoo! I'm busy.

Xaqairy...

What?

If you get a Pokémon, take really, really good care of it, OK?

What else would I do? Eat it?

Tai looks at his sister. Yeah... OK! Let's go get your Pokémon!

Oh, fuck. Go away. I don't need your help.

There's something I have to do!

You should've gone before you left, Taiyosu.

And to do that, I need someone I can trust besides my partner Pokémon. A person I can trust!

Well, I ain't holding it for you.

That's right! I'm talking about you! You seem like you've got good instincts!

What did I just say? Do you even listen to me?

Tai and his sister look at each other.You head on home.

OK, big brother!

And do me a favor. Take Taiyosu with you!

Bye-bye, Xaqairy!



All riiight! Let's go find that person named Bianca!

Oh, finally. Big, green hat. Must be her. Dammit, Taiyosu!

It's sooo pretty!

Yep, definitely someone not from around here. Gotta be Bianca.

Hey there! Don't you agree?

Don't expect me to agree with anything about scenery...

Oh! My name is Bianca! I'm the assistant of the Pokémon Professor - Professor Juniper.

I already know that. Gimme.

By the way, I'm looking for someone. Do you know a person named Xaqairy?

Let's see. Small town, I'm pretty sure everyone knows Xaqairy... That's me, dumb broad

Oh, wait! You're Xaqairy!

I just said that...

Wooow! You're ex-act-ly like what I heard!

Fuck. There goes my chance with her. What the hell did my mom put on the internet?!

Nice to meet you!

Yeah, yeah. Gimme.

I have a really important request to ask you!

Damn. Nothing's free. What is it?

Will you help us complete the Pokédex?

Complete the Pokédex... Dammit, woman. Thought you were gonna ask something hard. (Sarcastic, btw)

Oh, wow, thanks! Your support will help Professor Juniper's research move forward!

I don't care. For the third time: GIMME!

Anyway, filling up the Pokédex is totally fun!

Gimme!

Ok, then. Ta-daaa! In here is the Pokémon that will be your partner! Choose a Pokémon.

Dammit. Choices. The snake, the pig, or the otter... Pffff. No contest. Fire pig it is!

Oh, wow! You and Tepig are a perfect match!

I bet you would've said that about whomever I picked... You liar.

By the way, would you like to give a nickname to the Pokémon you chose?

Yeah, no.

Oh, OK, gotcha. You're not going to give it a nickname.
Now you've got your Pokémon, so I'll give you this, too - a Pokédex!

Well, duh. How could I fill it up if I don't have it?

Totally looks like a Digivise...

You want to know what it does?

It records Pokémon information after sighting it just once. I know this already...

Heeey! How long are you planning on keeping me waiting, anyway?

As long as it takes for me to figure out a way to fucking ditch you. Shoo.

Hey! What's that?

Duh. It's a Pokéball.

So that's your partner, huh? That's great! My sister already said so, but take really good care of your Pokémon! Got it?

Yes. I got it. Now go away.

What's that you're holding there?

It's a Pokédex!

Please give me a Pokédex, too! I want to get stronger!

Don't do it! It's a trap!

If I have a Pokédex, I can learn more about Pokémon... That'll make me tougher, right?

Bianca looks ate Tai funny. Um... who are you again?

Hahaha! No Pokédex for you!

I'm Taiyosu! I'm going to travel the Unova region with my Pokémon partner in order to search for something very important!

What? Someone who likes you?

After thinking it over: Well, OK!

Fuck.

I don't really get it, but going on a journey is always good! Anyway, I just happen to have another Pokédex on me!

Oh, what the fuck? Why would you have an extra one?

It looks like Pokémon distribution has really changed compared to two years ago, so the more, the merrier! Bianca gives Tai a Pokédex. Oh, I thought of something cool! You both have Pokémon, right? Why don't you have a Pokémon battle?

I don't wanna hang around him anymore. He's annoying as hell.

Let's see how good a Trainer you are! I'll use my Oshawott that I raised from an Egg!

Shut the hell up.

I totally 2HKO'd his Oshawott and my Tepig grew to Lv. 6! Yay~

And Tai mumbles something about leaving first, but I pay him no mind.

The Pokémon on both sides did their best! But this little one is still weak, so battle with it and make it stronger!

Shush. I totally 2HKO'd his ass.

All righty, let's go make your Pokémon better at the Pokémon Center!

Where else would I go?

Bianca shows me around, but I don't pay much attention. I've been in here before. I get a nice gift: Pokéballs. Yay~

Hasty Tepig: M; Lv.6

Pokéballs x10

Xtransceiver
Pal Pad
Town Map x2

Oh, Xaqairy! You can't go without...

Without what?!

You're with Tepig! OK. This is a going-away gift! Don't be shy. Take it.

Random guy at counter gives me a gift: Potion. And he explains how it works...

Since I know how to use a Pokéball, I don't pay much attention to Bianca. Why does her Lv. 5 Lilipup have 3 moves already? I call Hax.

Bianca tells me where Tai is. How the hell do you know where he is? And she just goes back to Aspertia and ignores me...

Before moving on to Flocessy Town, I managed to catch a Patrat and a Purrloin. Tepiggrew to Lv. 7 and learned Ember. Patrat grew to Lv. 4, then to Lv. 5. Purrloin grew to Lv. 3 and learned Growl. I bought some Potions and a couple more Pokéballs.

All of a sudden, Alder shows up. Hey, Trainer!

Now, what?

My name is Alder. I am a Trainer that has a lot of interest in the world.

Yeah, and? Just leave me out of it. I’m trying to get this errand over with.

One of my goals is to tell people how wonderful it is to walk toward the future together with Pokémon.

Like I said. Leave me out of it.

And you are?

Getting irritated.

So, you’re Xaqairy from Aspertia City!

How the hell did you know?

So he compliments my Patrat. What do you want? You want my Patrat? You can have her. And then he tries to insult me by saying I’m not a great Trainer. He’s right. My first complete play-through.

So I arrive in Flocessy Town and the PokéCenter is right there. What the hell?! You mean I don't have to go all the way back home to heal my Pokémon? Fuckin' A.
Oh, fuck. How do I get around Alder...

So I try to sneak around him. And he sees me. Oh, that's right! Xaqairy, are your Pokémon well?

That depends. How good is the Pokémon Center here?

Your Pokémon are always doing their best for you, the Trainer, so you must always be kind to them.

Why does everyone think I mistreat the little bastards? Everyone's against me.

My house is just a little further.

Why would I want to go to your house? I don't know you. As I head through Flocessy I discover there are only 2 ways out. The way I came in, which leads home. And the way that Alder is currently blocking. Fuck.

Hey, this way! Shall we start Training?

I dun wanna train with you.

By the way, why are you holding two maps?

I ain't telling you unless you can guess. Seeing what he already knows about me, he probably will... Fuck.

Oh ho. It's your friend's map is it?

Did you just call me a hoe? Friend? No, it's Taiyosu's map. He's not even close to my friend.

Your friend is the one with the Oshawott, isn't he?

Dammit. He's not my friend. And lemme guess. You harassed - I mean, trained - him, too?!

It just so happens, he was training his Pokémon on Route 20.

You stalker. Go bother him. Leave me alone.

Well if that's the case, you should go give him the Town Map first.

Yes! Two birds with one stone!

Before I head to R20, I figured I might as well head back to R19 to fight some more. If there's anything I remember about these games' Rivals: Withing the first few areas, you have to battle them again. During my time in R19, it started to rain. Why couldn't I have a Swift Swimmer?
Purrloin grew to Lv.4, then to Lv. 5.

And now to R20!

I try to cross the bridge and I get challenged. Go away! But I promptly KO his Patrat and my Purrloin grows to Lv. 6 and learns Assist. I continue on and get challenged again. Again, I promptly KO the Purrloin. Patrat grew to Lv. 6 and learned Bite. The third trainer: KO'd his Patrat. And I make it to Flocessy Ranch.

I take a stroll in the grass, and Oh, look! A new Pokémon! Gimme! First and second attempts broke the Pokéballs. Third time's the charm! I caught an Azurill! Now where's Taiyosu? I don't want this map.

I head into the fenced area. Oh, nice! You've come here to toughen up!

As usual, you're wrong, Taiyosu. I'm only here to give you this damn map.

All right! Let's see how much stronger you've become! Come at me!

Dammit, Taiyosu... Fine. I'll kick your ass again.

Oh, fuck. Oshawott plus rain... This will be a little tougher than last time. At least I have 4 Pokémon. Go Patrat, you're up first! Patrat and Oshawott are both nearly fainted. Alright Patrat, that's enough. Come on, Purrloin! You're up. Purrloin uses Ember (Assist), and that totally backfires. Get it? So Purrloin faints. Go Tepig! Your foe's weak! Tepig KOs Oshawott with ease. Patrat grows to Lv. 7.

Not bad...

Idiot. You should've caught more Pokémon. I totally kicked your ass.

What are you doing here anyway?

Dammit. Don't you listen? The Map, moron! Then he starts getting mushy. bleh

Yay, people that will get me away from Tai show up! I thought it was lively around here! You were having a Pokébattle, huh? Isn't it nice to be young?

Yep, I totally kicked this idiot's ass.

Who are you?

Locals, duh.

Who am I? I'm the owner of this ranch. And this is my wife.

After a Pokémon Battle, you should heal your Pokémon's HP, right?

Yep, I'm heading back to Flocessy right now. I don't wanna be around this dimwit any longer.

And she hands me a Potion. Yay! More free stuff. Damn. She gave one to Tai, too.

By the way, you didn't happen to see a Herdier around here, did you? I can't figure out where it went. Our two Herdier are always together and this is the first time one has wandered off, so I'm a little worried...

And before I could say anything, You're a little worried? Are you KIDDING me?! Your Pokémon might be lost forever!

And that's why you're an idiot.

Whatever! I'll look! Xaqairy! Help out!

Damn. I knew you were gonna drag me into this.

As he runs off, Why did he get so mad?

I don't understand idiots.

I think it's probably just playing somewhere in the ranch.

I wonder... By the way, dear, if your Pokémon get hurt, let me know.

Why? So you can eat them?

I'll make them feel better for you!

As I walk around the area, I head up a little. Did Herdier... wander somewhere back here?

You truly cease to amaze me. That's why I'm looking back here. I don't know.

Let's have a look!

... He runs on ahead of me. Sucker. I'm looking the other way. And I found a Trainer to battle! Yay! Purrloin and Sewaddle were an easy match. Tepig grew to Lv. 9 and learned Odor Sleuth. OMG! A wild Psyduck! Gimme! Yus! Gotcha! And a Mareep. Yay! I haz 6 now!.
But now I'm forced to follow Tai.

Wow, this ranch is really big!
I move on; away from the idiot...

And I get challenged by the Janitor... Psyduck and Azurill grew to Lv. 6. Youngster Kenny is my next opponent. Yawn. Psyduck grew to Lv. 7. Mareep grew to Lv. 6. Caught a Lilipup.

I continue on my way to find Herdier. Where is that damn dog?

I finally find the Herdier, but it seems that someone else already found it. Excuse me, but I don't think that's yours. Dumbass Tai runs to find the owners and bring them here.

Tch... You little pest!

What did I do?

I'm a member of a group that strikes fear into the hearts of those who stand before it: Team Plasma! Ever heard of it?

You don't look like much to me...

Really? We're the righteous group that tried to conquer Unova two years back in order to liberate Pokémon!

I don't think "conquer" and "liberate" go in the same sentence like that...

Whatever... Fools will never understand us...

That's funny. 'Cuz I never understand idiots. So if I'm a fool, you're an idiot.

Still... First I got lost chasing Herdier... and now some nosy kid caught me! All of this is your fault! Take this!

Nosy, huh? I was forced, dude. Don't blame me. Then he gave me a gift: TM21 Frustration. And he runs away...

We return the Herdier to the owner. Now back to Alder. Fuck.

Lax Mareep: M; Lv. 6; Static
Docile Azurill: F; Lv. 7; Thick Fat
Quirky Purrloin: M; Lv. 7; Unburden
Lax Psyduck: M; Lv 7; Damp
Hasty Tepig: M; Lv. 8; Blaze
Careful Lilipup; F; Lv. 5; Pickup

Pokéballs x4
X Attack

Potion x2

No. 21 Frustration

Xtransceiver
Pal Pad
Town Map

Calm Patrat: F; Lv. 7; Keen Eye

So I meet up with Alder and he decides not to train me after all. Yus! I got away!

I’d like you to help me with something.

Fuck. I follow him into his house. And I find two children inside.

Oh! Are we going to help train that person, sir?

Oh, hi, little girl. So you’re gonna be touching me? Not him? Maybe this “training” won’t be
so bad.

Really? But that Trainer looks really tough!

You got that right. I’m not letting you touch me too, little boy. Only her.

That’s right! This Trainer may be tough, but you can learn from losing as well.

Losing? Only if he tries to touch me. Then he’ll lose his fingers.

More importantly, haven’t I been telling you just to enjoy Pokémon battles?

Pokémon battles? That’s what this is about? Damn.

So, Xaqairy! Please be their opponent!

Fuck you, Alder. Fine. Lemme kick their asses.

So the boy decides to go first. A Pansage? Dammit! I want one! Tepig’s Ember 2HKOs it and he grows to Lv. 10. And now the girl’s turn. And she has a Panpour! Where did they get them!? Patrat grew to Lv. 8 and learned Bide. Azurill grew to Lv. 8. Then Alder explains typing and STAB. I tune out after that.

I walk outside into the rain only to find a guy in a white suit. I know this is sudden, but nice to meet you!

Dammit. Another old guy who wants to “train” me? Go away.

Now, don’t say anything. Just take this! So I just glare at him as he gives me a Medal Box. That is a Medal Box! And, people call me Mr. Medal!

… Another idiot? I already know what it is…

…By the way, do you know a competition called the Medal Rally?

Nope, and I don’t care, either.

Whether you know it or not, I’ll explain it to you!

Does anyone listen to me at all?

The Medal Rally is an event that evaluates various activities of Trainers. So… In commemoration of your participation, please take this Medal!

When did I decide to partici… Oooo, Shiny!

And he walks away… But I got 6 Shiny Objects! Yay~

Alder comes out of his house and starts talking about Aspertia City’s new Pokémon Gym. Aspertia has a gym now? Cool! Looks like I’m heading home.

As I exit the town, Xaqairy! Excuse me! I forgot to tell you something important!

You’re starting to be more annoying than Taiyosu, old man…

First, take these! And he gives me Oran Berries. He continues on to explain what they are and what they do. And how to have my Pokémon hold them.

I decide to do some grinding before I head home. Maybe Lv. 10 Pokémon would be smart to have. A couple Purrloin and a Patrat weren’t doing much for me, so I decided to head for R20. Lilipup grew to Lv. 6.

Caught a Sunkern, a Pidove, and a Riolu. Lilipup grew to Lv. 7 and to Lv. 8 and learned Bite. Psyduck grew to Lv. 8 and learned Water Gun. Sunkern grew to Lv. 3.

Quiet Sunkern: M; Lv. 3; Chlorophyll;
Rash Riolu: M; Lv. 5; Inner Focus; Oran Berry
Lax Mareep: M; Lv. 6; Static; No item
Brave Pidove: M; Lv. 7; Big Pecks; No item
Quirky Purrloin: M; Lv. 7; Unburden; Oran Berry
Hasty Tepig: M; Lv. 10; Blaze; No item

Pokéballs x6
X Attack

Potion x8
Antidote

No. 21 Frustration

Xtransceiver
Pal Pad
Town Map
Medal Box

• First Step
  
• Pokémon Center Fan
  
• Hint Medal x5

Calm Patrat: F; Lv. 8; Keen Eye; No item
Careful Lilipup: F; Lv. 8; Pickup; No item
Lax Psyduck: M; Lv. 8; Damp; No item
Docile Azurill: F; Lv. 8; Thick Fat; No item