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Xiv's PokéBlack Journey

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1 Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Mon Oct 08, 2012 1:59 am

Xiviette

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So like I started playing Pokémon Black 2 earlier today and there so many things I'd like to poke at. THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS. Woot!

Aspertia City

I'm playing as the male character because Kyouhei all day erryday. Anyways game starts and I'm in my house where my mom is interrogating me:

KYOUHEI YOU WANT A POKEMON?

YESPLS

KYOUHEI YOU WANT A POKEDEX

NOOOO 649 POKEMANS TOO MUCH

KYOUHEI BE MORE AGREEABLE PLS



-after interrogation-

I run into my rival guy and I named him Zane. He looks like a Zane. Zane is so...I can't describe him. APPARENTLY I'M HIS WINGMAN AND I WAS BORN TO BE HIS WINGMAN.

He stalks me to Bianca

ANYWHO I GRAB AN OSHAWOTT CUZ RLLY. SAMU-OTTER 2 KEWLS. I proceed to name my oshawott Shindou until I realized it has ovaries... Y U FUGS FEMALE AND DOCILE

No nickname.

Bianca gives me a Pokédex cus mom forced me and everyone is conspiring against me. Sob.

THEN MY PUSHY RIVAL GETS ALL CUTESY

OMG KYOUHEI WUTS DAT SHINY POKéDEX IN YO HAND? I WUNT ONE.



Ofc Bianca gives him one. "More the merrier" WHAT WILL GO WRONG FROM GIVING A STRANGER CHILD AN IMPORTANT DEVICE?

NOTHING!

Tutorial thing happens and Bianca gives me balls and drags me outside to show me how to use my balls. Mom finally rewards me for enduring her interrogation. *KYOUHEI LEARNED HOW TO RUN* AND THE MOMENT BLOWS UP WHEN ZANE'S SISTER MAKES ME CHASE HIM DOWN.

Bitch. Imma hunt you down Zane and imma chuck this extra town map in yo face.

So...heading towards the next town a pedo appears and offers me "training." What are these people thinking? Letting children go out in the world with powerful mutant creatures and now allowing them to follow strangers. GG.

Floccesy Town

His pedo vision kicks in when he brings me near his house and tells me to gtfo. KYOUHEI YOU BETTER GIVE THAT EXTRA TOWN MAP TO ZANE. COME BACK LATER BBY AND BRING YO CUTE FREND QURL.

OKAY ALDER. OKAY.

Then I find Zane at this ranch place...he doesn't know why he's there and he doesn't gaf. PERFECT MOMENT FOR A POKéBATTLE! DUNDUNDUN. I win. gtfo of here Zane!

WILD RANCHERS APPEARED! Now I'm compelled to find a lost overgrown puppy. THANKS ZANE.

"Pokémon just don't wander off on their own"

GENIUS! ZANE! GENIUS!

Ofc I find the herdier and some grunt is backing it up in a corner...

"Have you ever heard of Team Plasma?"

>>No



"We're the righteous group that tried to conquer Unova two years ago"



So...the grunt gets mad and throws TM 21 frustration at me instead of battling me. Team Rocket more hardcore.



Grateful owner comes for the herdier and Zane follows him back. Zane needs to learn how to chill. Always so pessimistic. "YOUR POKéMON MIGHT HAVE BEEN GONE FOR GOOD!"

Omerghad now to head back to pedo Alder! One thing leads to another...I have to battle his other pedo candies because I've "grown" too much. Alder doesn't want to train me anymore sob.

Fleeing Alder's pedo cave...I run into another weirdo stranger who gives me a free item! Yay! Now I'm a boy scout! *KYOUHEI EARNED A NEWB MEDAL*

So how are you gaiz? How goes the BW2 gameplay? I'll post up links tomorrow if you guys haven't played. Er and I'll be rambling throughout my B2 gameplay! WOOT

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2 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Mon Oct 08, 2012 8:33 am

Bloodie Boi

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Fak! Gimme nao! and I haz no time to play ;A;
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3 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Mon Oct 08, 2012 2:21 pm

Xiviette

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Virbank City
I'm off to see the gym leader~ The gym leader of Virbank~
Happy moment spoiled when everyone in the streets learn of Roxie's parental problem. Lesigh. She throws a tantrum and runs off.

MEANWHILE IN A PRETTY BIG CITY! ROXIE WHERE'D YOU GO RUNT?

It's kind of sad since her gym is this anorexic little building with neon lights.

I've also just noticed that this game is incredibly friendly.

My list of freebies so far:
x11 Pokeballs
x4 Potions
x2 Fresh Water
x1 Parylz Heal
x5 Oran Berry
x3 Pecha Berry



Woot! Kasial rapes Roxie's gym and I get scouted for my boyish good looks. OFF TO MAKE A MOVIE!

Long tour...
Boss with gay-ish ways of talking...
Afro guy...
Roxie's mom...
Stupid Brycen-man villain...



Roxie's mom gives up her dreams of being a movie star until she says she's a father. Faq. First Pokemon trap I fell for.

WOOT NOW I'M A MOVIE STAR! I BEAT UP POKEMON FOR'REALS AND I LOOK GOOD DOING IT.

My good mood gets ruined because I spot the non-chill duo getting into trouble with Team Plasma. OFC I HAVE TO BATTLE THEM. Team Plasma retreats like usual...BUT THE NON-CHILL DUO MAKES ME CHASE THEM DOWN ANYWAYS.


GDI ROXIE AND ZANE

LEAVE ME ALONE OR I'LL CUT YOU!

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4 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Mon Oct 08, 2012 4:11 pm

Sunshine Force

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xiviette wrote:LEAVE ME ALONE OR I'LL CUT YOU!

Onto my quotes list, my love. <3 You absolutely win! ( = w = )b








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5 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Mon Oct 08, 2012 4:47 pm

Xiviette

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Forever LostCastelia City

Did I mention how nice this game is?

I get a free luxury boat ride and a free bicycle when I come to Castelia. WOOTTTT ALL DA FREEBIES!

After my wild clown hunt I proceed to go find the gym leader who decided to chase down Team Plasma. What is up with Unova people and their obsession with chasing down Team Plasma?



Iris and Zane team up against me and force me to train in a sewer.

IN
A
SEWER


I got leftovers from the sewer though and I meet the weirdo scientist guy. He's not important. GYM LEADER APPEARS WOOT SO OFC I GET OUTTA THAT SH- HOLE. Literally.

Then I go into Burghehgd's whatever his name is gym

...



GIANT ASS COCOONS

WHY BURGHEHGD

WHY

The creepy part was them SUCKING ME IN and SPITTING me out of another cocoon.

At this point, I'm confused cause Burghehgd's gym leader room looks like some unicorn puked all over it. I SWEAR GUYS. SOMEONE WAS HIGH WHEN THEY MADE HIS ROOM.

Oh well I just want my badge and get outta there so Kasial's blaze kicking errything. (He's a Lucario nowww agasfad)

Burghehgd decides to plague my mind and makes the only exit a tube down in a cocoon that I have to BREAK out of.

I DON'T LIKE THIS SYMBOLISM BURN IT ALL

I go to fight weirdo scientist guy who seems to be the only normal one (God forbid) so far. He runs off and I run to the next place only to find myself in diff weather.

SAND=SANDILE FKYEAH!

Caught three:
- Mild
- Bashful
- Timid

I give up. Exit the sand area into a SANDSTORM

I need to say that this game is nice (again) because some ranger guy gave me a rawst berry just for beating him and weirdo scientist guy gave me protein for beating him too.

I feel the love.

@Asucchi Roxie gave me cut and made me chase down a Plasma Grunt. FOLEBAH SAD. THESE BOSSY PEOPLE TRYNNA BRIBE ME WITH THINGS I DON'T WANT.

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6 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Mon Oct 08, 2012 4:56 pm

Sunshine Force

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They give you free stuff to bribe you into doing their dirty work.








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7 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Tue Oct 09, 2012 1:06 am

Xiviette

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Nimbasa City

After being buffeted by the sandstorm I get involved with Mei...aka Rosa. Nothing interesting except the twin subway bosses. Sadly, I only remember Emmet because he kept introducing himself.



So...I go and ride on rollercoasters to hunt down Elesa who apparently rides rollercoasters in her free time. Nothing interesting happens. Again. Elesa had flee'd back into her gym after I ride around the WHOLE PLACE.

I get bored cause nothing is happening and I decide to go
Pokémon hunting! It ended up really successfully because I caught an eevee and such a beautiful cottonee.



RIDE MY BIKE BACK TO NIMBASA BECAUSE I WAS READY TO RAPE ELESA.

Little did I know that I had to strut my stuff in front of an audience and battle at the same time

Blaze kick'd em all



THE WHEELS OF FATE ARE TURNING AND ELESA'S STRIPPING MEANS IT'S TIME TO HAVE AN EPIC BATTLE!

Burned emolga with a blaze kick and it volt switches me into an electric zebra.

Psh.

Blaze kick errything.

Until I realized the zebra knows flame charge



Kasial ended up being paralyzed and getting hit with flame charges. ELESA DECIDES TO BE A BITCH AND USE A HYPER/SUPER POTION THINGY ON THE ZEBRA. Still won in the end with 10 HP to spare. Elesa is one scurry woman yo and you best not disrespect her or she'll fk yo shit up.


I leave the catwalk with a bunch of fine ladies escorting me. Hell yeah.

Decide to go bike riding and I see Zane in front of Team Plasma grunts. OhGod. Of course I come to help him.

BUT

HE WAS THE ONE WHO CAUSED TROUBLE FIRST

HRRRRNG

Zane's talk with le grunts
v

WUT U PLASMA GRUNTS DOIN?

Nothing we're just standing around why are you questioning us?

I HATE PKMN THIEVES AND IMMA BEATCHU UP. FEEL MY RAGE.

ZANE WHY YOU BULLY DEM? THEY JUST STANDING AROUND. YOU TOO OBSESSED AND YOU NEED CHILL PILLS.

Leave me out of it ZANE!

"Kyouhei! Cover me"



I kick Plasma outta there and Zane runs off again trying to hunt them down. FUUUU-- All good. NIMBASA CITY ESCAPE!

*Wild Bianca Appeared!*

*Wild Bianca gave Kyouhei the ability to fly!*

Bianca then showed me the most amazing thing--ever.

*KYOUHEI FOLLOWED THE ROAD AND DISCOVERED NARNIA*



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8 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Tue Oct 09, 2012 3:57 pm

Xiviette

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Driftveil City

I was enjoying my bike ride over the bridge thingy until I came into the city and saw two members of Plasma.

WE ALL CAN GUESS WHAT HAPPENS NEXT RIGHT?



Zane appears and pushes the black one away just because he's a Plasma grunt. I swear Zane has some sort of Team Plasma tracking device under all that hair of his. Black Plasma flees and white Plasma is a pansy.

Pansy Plasma takes me to his leader and Zane follows because...he has an obsession with stalking Plasma people. I duel the old fart and he gives me his master's Pokémon

DUNDUNDUN KYOUHEI RECEIVED N'S ZORUA

KYOUHEI PCs ZORUA AND HEADS TO GYM

Clay had too much free time and spent it on renovating his gym into a giant maze. Gee. Thanks Clay. I literally had to explore the whole gym before I got to Clay.

So about that cottonee that I caught. Yeah. It totally raped. Annoying lil' bugger.


Clay then takes me up his private lift and there was a LOT of darkness before we went up. This guy prolly felt up poor Kyouhei in the dark.



Outside, I see Zane again and he was waiting for me...weird. Doesn't he have some Team Plasma stalking to do? Ofc he does so he runs off again after Clay talks about the world...tournament...thingy.

I love the bicycle I got from that clown in Castelia.


Ride it errywhere.

Hit the marketplace for moo-moo milks and then went to look for Clay. Surprise~ Surprise~ Zane decided to take a break from stalking and now he wants to battle. Clay also brought another surprise.

WILD CHEREN APPEARED!

You know what?

You bitches bring it on! Gonna win this tourney with the power of protagonist!


Ofc. I battle Zane first and I wonder how the announcer knows about his lost Pokémon obsession too.


Win the tourney like a boss and only received 1 battle point.

Leave the place and a Plasma grunt runs behind me while I'm talking to Cheren. Zane's ears perk up and he goes to chase him down.

"Kyouhei! Come with me"



Luckily, for me Cheren volunteered so I'm stuck talking to scientist weirdo man. We both conclude that Zane is a psychopath who believes he is invincible because he has Pokémon. Welp, time to chase down ANOTHER plasma grunt with Zane.

We end up on a boat and surrounded by Plasma people. All Zane can say is, "Just a heads up...I'm about to unleash my rage!"

I AM TOO! AT YOU! YOU AIN'T GOKU FROM DBZ.


Oh hell nawww the first grunt sends out a koffing. Bitch, that's what Team Rocket grunts use. GTFO OF HERE.

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9 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Tue Oct 09, 2012 11:12 pm

Xiviette

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Mistralton City



Finally got to Mistralton city after going through that horrendous cave filled of electricity. Then I meet Prof. Juniper! DUNDUNDUN.

I find her quite delightful since she reminds me of...me in a strange way. Blahblahblah~ I meet Skyla whose hair is wtf to me



WELP OFF TO HER GYM!

...



Too easy.

The only weird thing that happened here was the two kids who gave me a TM...that I found. This place was boring. At least I got a free plane ride to Opelucid.

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10 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Wed Oct 10, 2012 2:57 pm

Xiviette

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Opelucid City

After getting lost again in like three different places...

I FOUND THE CITY WITH THE GYM LEADER! FKYEAH! IRIS GET OUT OF MY WAY HOE!


I immediately head over to the gym to challenge Iris' grandfather or something. I gotta say...the gym is BADASS!

Riding on a dragon muthfakas!

This point in the game, I'm relying on my Lucario only since my Volcarona has the worst moves possible for her level.


Forgot to mention I caught Cobalion and Virizion


So I took it to the gym along with my Lucario and they did pretty good. Sadly Cobalion had to solo like two of Drayden's pokemon. His last Pokemon was scurry as hell. Haxorus.

STOP YOUR DRAGON DANCING!


*KYOUHEI REALIZED IT'S NOT ATTACKING*

Cobalion raped Haxorus

All that dragon dance spam and no attack. Lols.

Drayden then takes me to his house and explains the DNA splicer which I don't care about.


Then something explodes and outside...we experience an awesome cut scene. TEAM PLASMA'S SHIP FLIES?! OMERGHAD. SO COOS. Then they take out an ice cannon and started to blast at me and Opelucid city.


Drayden then makes me chase off the rest of the Plasma guys before they take the DNA thingyerbob. They did take it in the end anyways. GG Shadow Triad. Well played.


Cheren and Zane call in just to check up on me or something and then I go and battle one of the triad guys. He flees. I fly back to Undella town because Zane said so...?

Ride my bike into the aquarium place and it is just...omfg me gusta.


Humilau City

I instantly head over to the gym and Zane then tells me that I should win my last badge. YES. ZANE. YES. However, I had to look for the gym leader which was pretty easy. Head over to his gym and float around on the lilypads~ I was pretty amused.

Marlon is kinda awkward to me and not just because he has an awkward tan. He speaks so...surfer and stuff. I beat him a lot easier than Drayden and that leads me to think that they should've made Drayden the 8th gym leader.


I get the flip outta that gym and Zane mocks me by saying that now I have 8 badges...I should go fight the E4 and stuff. AHAHA KYOUHEI U SO SILLEH WE HAB TO BEAT PLASMA FURST SO COME TO ROUTE 22 LAWLS.



I find Terrakion and scientist weirdo guy gives me a strange machinery with a tip that I should explore the seaside cave. I catch Terrakion and make my way over there because IT'S NOT LIKE I HAVE TO BEAT THE E4 OR ANYTHING.

Just great because I run into Zane and Marlon right where Plasma's airship is parked. I follow Zane into there and beat shit up. NEXT COMES A FUN LASER PUZZLE! Then we meet that Zinzalong guy again and he shows us Kyurem.

Zane interrogates him like every Plasma grunt and Zin finally brings up the million dollar question.

WHY THE FK ARE YOU SO FIXATED ON ONE PURRLOIN?

So apparently Zane wants it back because it was a present for his little sister from his dead grandpa. Things are making more sense now. I still think he's still wayyyy obsessed with Plasma. Zin calls in the Shadow triad to place a physical restraining order against Zane and I.

They fly off on their boat ship and Cheren catches up with us telling me to go to some kinda chasm.

Kay.

Watevs.

NOT LIKE I HAVE TO BE A POKEMON CHAMP OR ANYTHING.

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11 Re: Xiv's PokéBlack Journey on Wed Oct 10, 2012 5:48 pm

Xiviette

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Giant Chasm

So...somehow I made it onto Team Plasma's HQ again aboard the flying ship. Zane goes on and beats the crud out of the grunts and here I am solving more puzzles. Lame password btw.
Psh.

Now here comes a small plot twist! I slap the goodies off Zinzalgalong or whatever and head into a portal. Mr.Weirdo scientist guy comes down from his stairs...? We battle cause it's fate and he wants to see my pokemons. He has an epiphany and tells me to scurry off and find Ghetsis.

I find Ghetsis and he blows a gasket over Mr.Weirdo scientist guy for giving up and losing to me. So he sics the Shadow Triad on me while he flees. FML. Zane appears and interrogates one of the triad dudes and voila! A HIT!

Well, I proceed to beat them all and one of the triad goons give back the evolved purrloin to Zane. Zane decides to stay behind and soak in the reality. I chase Ghetsis into another cave woot!

Ghetsis summons Kyurem! Boooo
Ghetsis wants to kill me! FUCK YOU GHETSIS
N comes to save me! I HAD TO DEAL WITH TEAM PLASMA BECAUSE YOU TOOK A VACATION.


Ghetsis fuses zekrom and kyurem into an ugly abomination


So I take down ugly Zekyurem in two hits and Ghetsis gets butthurt and battles me right after that.

Psh.

Then I realized his team is scurry ass powerfuls


I finally beat him with 1HP to spare and Kasial lvs to 60




All N did was thank me and tell me to go challenge the Elite Four. Zane shows up and does the same. Least you hoes could do was heal my pokemon.

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